


Road Trip To Nowhere In Particular

by ThatsMyQToLeave



Category: Star Trek: The Next Generation
Genre: Getting Together, M/M, Picard Just Wants To Read His Book, Q’s an idiot, Road Trip, qcard
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-23
Updated: 2020-11-06
Packaged: 2021-03-09 01:55:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,815
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27156229
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThatsMyQToLeave/pseuds/ThatsMyQToLeave
Summary: Q forces Picard to go on a road trip through America in 2015. On this journey Picard just wants to read his book while Q drags him to random weird attractions. They learn more about about each other and maybe just maybe Picard doesn’t hate Q as much as he thinks.Please don't give me hate I am very small and I have no money. So you can imagine the kind of stress that I am under. Also this is my first Star Trek fanfic
Relationships: Jean-Luc Picard/Q
Comments: 2
Kudos: 11





	1. Kansas: World’s Largest Ball of Twine

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you @bitribbles on A03 and tumblr for the line "God don't tell me you want to reenact romeo and juliet again."

I was sitting in my quarters reading when I fell on pavement. I placed my book on the ground and got up brushing the dirt off my clothes. I picked up the book and glanced around to see a few brick buildings before noticing Q standing behind me. "What is it this time? God don't tell me you want to reenact romeo and juliet again." 

"No... well unless you want to. We're going on a road trip!" He said with the excitement and enthusiasm of a child seeing a tribbles for the first time. What game was he trying to play? He's dragged me places more obscure but there was normally something at least a little interesting about them. "Take me back to my ship!" I demanded. 

"No can do, Picard. There's no way you're going to get out of this one." He wasn't wrong. There was no where to run to and even if there was Q wouldn't let me. "What are you trying to pull, Q?"  
"Nothing I just want to have some fun." 

I glanced around for some sort of vehicle but didn't see anything. How did he except us to go on a road trip with no vehicle? Where are we? When are we? "I have so many questions I don't even know where to start. Where are we? When are we?" 

"We're in Russell, Kansas 2015." So we're in America? In 2015? Well at least it's not 2020. Why are we starting here? Does he even know how dangerous this could be? What if we mess up the timeline? What if being here has or will drastically change the events of history? There was no way I could stop Q from going through with this.

"Okay how are we going to get anywhere? If this is a road trip we need a car, which I remind you we don't have." Q snapped his fingers and a car appeared next to me. Who's going to drive? I barely know how since they stopped making these kinds of cars a long time ago. The only reason I know how is because my brother had one and let me drive it a couple of times. Come to think of why did I need to drive at all? "Couldn't you just, I don't know, teleport us instead of having to drive?" 

"But this would be more fun!" I let out a sigh and gestured for Q to give me the keys. "Give me the keys, I really don't trust you to drive." Q handed me the keys but not before pouting. I got in the car and placed my book on the dash before adjusting my seat and mirrors. "Where are you going?" 

"There's two places, Cawker City which is an hour from here and Holocomb which is 4." Why did he even give me the 4 hour option? Did he except me to willingly drive 4 hours? 

"I'm not driving 4 hours. What's even in Cawker City and Holocomb?" Q was putting in directions to the screen next to me.  
"Oh Cawker has a giant ball of twine and Holocomb has a house where the Clutter family was murdered. There was a famous-" I interrupted Q's excited rambling.  
"I'm not driving you to a murder house 4 hours away."

I started the car and anxiously began driving. I followed the directions Q had set up. The comfortable quiet humming of the car was soon interrupted by Q saying "How big to think the ball of twine is? I feel like I could make a bigger ball of twine-"  
I tried to focus on driving but it was getting to be more difficult with Q talking. "For the love of god stop talking."  
"Fine..." 

I could see Q pick up my book from the corner of my eye. "Put it down!" Q dropped it back onto the dash. He crossed his arms and leaned backwards into his seat. "But I'm just gonna read." Knowing Q he would've found a way to destroy it intentionally or not. I just started reading that book and I intended to finish it.  
"I know you, you're not just going to read it." 

________

I parked next to the ball of twine and leaned against my seat. God hopefully I'll be back on the enterprise soon. Though I know I'll probably have to drive Q around more before he'll send me back. What did he want from this? What could he possibly gain? He said something about this being fun earlier but was he really that bored he'd drag me all the way out in the middle of nowhere?  
At least I'll have a little time alone while Q looked at the ball of twine. I probably wasn't going to get a lot of that during this trip. How long was this trip going to last anyway? 

Q quickly got out of the car. I grabbed my book but I kept my eyes on Q. I watched him run and then stop dead in his tracks. Oh god what is it now? I reluctantly got out of the car and walked up to Q. "I thought it was going to be bigger." He said disappointed, what was he expecting? Why did he even want to see a ball of twine in the first place?  
"Well it's fairly big, it's apparently the largest in the world." I glanced over at Q who had a look in his eyes that could only mean he was planning something. "No. Whatever it is just don't."  
"Oh come on! I could make a bigger one, I'd be the most exciting thing to happen to this town." He wasn't wrong considering from the looks of it their only attraction is a ball of twine. "No, who knows what will happen to the future."  
"Oh come on, why should I care about how it's going to affect the future, it's not like it'll affect me."  
"Well it's going to affect me. Is that a good enough reason for you Q?" I didn't want to argue with Q so I let out a deep sigh. "How about we get ice cream? I saw a few groceries stores on our way in."


	2. Nebraska: Rest Area

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This isn't important but here's some details about the story I couldn't causally add into the story.   
> 1\. The place Picard sleeps at in Cawker City is the Shady Grove Cabins   
> 2\. The town they stop to get to get McDonald's is called Holdrege in Nebraska. The Mcdolands they eat at has 2.8 stars.   
> 3\. The 2010 census states Alliance Nebraska had a population of 8,491   
> 4\. The 2010 census said Cawker City had a population of 469

I woke up to see Q looming over me. Where am I? Why is Q here? I sat up and rubbed my eyes before glancing around. Once I recognized I was in the inn I remembered everything. I wish yesterday was a dream or more accurately a nightmare but alas here I am. "How long have you been staring at me?" I wonder what he was going to make me do today. Where were we going? If yesterday was a clue it wouldn't make a lot of sense or at least it wouldn't make a lot of sense to me. 

"Not too long I spent most of the night wandering around the town. Did you know they had an museum? Kinda boring but that's to be expected considering how small the town is. The museum was created in 1971 and is in an old-" Q said with a passion that was only matched by a child who just saw a movie for the first time. It's amazing how he can talk about nothing and make it sound like something. 

"Is there any point to your babbling, Q?" I said interrupting him from his nonsensical ramblings.   
"Not particularly but it is interesting. Anyway get ready we're going to be driving for about 6 hours today to Alliance, Nebraska." I swear this trip is going to be the death of me.  
"6 hours? You except me to drive 6 hours?"  
"Yes, unless you want me to drive." As much as I didn't like driving I liked the idea of Q driving even less. I got out of bed and began getting ready for an long painful day. 

_________

I had been driving for 2 hours when Q insisted we stop at the the building with the yellow M sign. I parked at the closest spot to the building. "Time for lunch!" I mean I was hungry but I knew Q didn't want to have lunch for my sake. Q didn't even need to eat so why this place? From the looks of this place it wasn't going to be something worth pulling over for. 

I got out of the car and made the split second decision to bring my book with me and put it in my pocket. We walked inside. I glanced around at the menu and decided on a salad because how could they mess up a salad? Besides I didn't understand anything else on the menu.Q got something called a happy meal. When we got our food we sat down at a table. "I can't believe you got a salad. You know you don't make friends with salad." Q said this in a way that made it sound like I should understand what he meant. Was he really going to make fun of me for not wanting to eat whatever a McRib was? "I'm not here to make friends and besides I'm not going to eat food I don't understand " 

"You're loss." Q opened the red box in front of him and pulled out a small plastic baggie with something in it. Q quickly tore apart of the bag to reveal a small stuffed bear. "Yes I got the Build-A-Bear one!" Build-A-Bear? Is that what that small plush is called? I started to eat my salad. Q didn't touch any of the food in the box and started examining the bear. "Why did you order something if you weren't going to eat it?" Q glanced up at me and then back at the bear. "Oh I only ordered it for the toy." 

_______

With Q's instructions and 6 hours of driving we made it to see a stack of hay with a toilet, a chair, and a few signs. I would've guessed this was a joke but Q is too ecstatic for it to be a joke. Q turned to me and said: "Do you think I can I shit in the toilet? I'm going to try." Q got out of the car and ran over to the toilet. I quickly got out of the car and ran as fast as possible to catch up to him. "Don't you dare shit in that toilet!" 

"Fine! I wasn't actually going to. It was just a joke." I seriously doubted that. I looked around to see barely anything. It finally sunk in that I drove 6 hours just to see bails of hay. All I can assume is it's a shitty modern art project.   
"Did I really drive 6 hours to see hay?"   
"But it has free WiFi! I don't know what it is but it's free!"   
"Y'know what? Next time I'm choosing where we're going!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m sorry this was so short but in my defense I wrote most of this during the election


End file.
